Dear Crush,
It has been long since we have last actually talked. Our talks are more of formalities and forced conversations these days, most of the times me forcing the conversation. I just hope I don't creep you out. It saddens me that the distance that I feared would creep in has finally started taking its toll on our "relationship". How I wished the things would have turned differently! Had I been a l'le more courageous, a slightly bolder maybe, the story might have been a l'le different. Maybe fate had it in its store this pain for me. May be it was destined to happen. Or maybe it is just me screwing up everything that existed between us. Time and again did I try to hate you, forget you, to push away the memories and attachments, without any success. And here we stand today, almost at the end of our journey together. I could never read ur mind, whereas you always could read mind. I won't ever be guess what your feelings are for me. I have pulled up this stunt of being the selfless lover for way to long, and it hurts. It hurts when you ignore me. The Pang of guilt jealousy Hits hard everytime I see you getting close to any other guy. When it all started I comforted myself by thinking of this as mere infatuation of a teenager, but it has been 3 years since then, and am no longer a teen, hence no longer can I play the card of I-will-soon-get-over-it card. Just a faintest of hope that you will stumble upon this and maybe confront me directly - either let me in life ar maybe slap me hard enough to bring me back to my senses.
"And maybe one day we will wake up and these all will be a dream"
Yours always....
